It’s quiet in my house with just the dishwasher keeping me company as it helps me get ready for tomorrow. I feel I can use all the help I can get at this point. All day long I’ve had pre-observation jitters. For days I have been carefully contemplating what I will teach and polishing it up. There are no dress rehearsals; only the ones in my mind that keep playing over and over. I have read that it is helpful to visualize success before a performance, but I need a rest. My friend, who also has her formal observation this week, and I wonder why if we have been doing this teaching for so many years does this seem so intimidating? We should be able to pluck a successful idea out of our heads, tie it to the Common Core Standard we need and think of I Can statements while we are walking in from the car, whip up wonderful student engagement pieces while we are taking off our coats, and run over all of our formative assessment and exit ticket ideas while we are multitasking; greeting colleagues and checking e-mail. And we probably can! But teaching is an art which means that what we have done in the past will always be tweaked, adjusted and polished for this particular group of learners we have in front of us. It will always have room for improvement, but when I am being observed, I want perfection. It is like trying to walk through the inside of a pinball machine carrying a cup of coffee and avoiding the little ball ricocheting around without spilling a drop. A nice thought, but unlikely in the real world to happen.
But I love my job. Tomorrow I will be excited and happy to see my kids. It will be “Lights, camera, action!” as it is every day. And it will be perfect, whatever the outcome.